Day 119: Lies

Tomorrow I'm off to Los Angeles, so I'm giving advance warning that their may be some timing issues with my blog.  I'm not sure if you'll get it early or late, but don't panic it will be coming.  Everybody knows the story of George Washington who owned up to having damaged his father's cherry tree with an axe and then was rewarded for his honesty rather than punished.  And yet I wonder if that is entirely rational behaviour?  Why would you own up to a "mistake" if you can get away with it?  We recently discovered that our ceiling light was damaged probably during a party Eliot had at the flat for the end of his school.  Once we discovered the broken light the debate was more about the fact that nobody owned up to breaking it rather then the breakage itself.  As a child you are taught that lying is a bad thing but who benefits from this ?  Surely the main thing is to not be caught in the lie rather then not lying? I'm pretty sure my daughter lied to me quite a lot as a teenager especially about her use of recreational drugs, and many parents would find that unacceptable.  But I can't say that it would have made a real difference to either of us.  Maybe Sasha would have felt a little less guilty (I don't think she lost much sleep about lying to me) and I would have patted myself on the back for having such a good relationship with my daughter.

In conclusion I think lies are only given importance when there are fundamental problems in a relationship.  A strong relationship can easily survive an occasional lie.