Tuesday, 8 January 2019

Day 279 : Parenting

Diner Menu:
  • Couscous aux merguez
  • Yaourt de brebis et banane plantain
  • CarrĂ© de chocolat noir 85%
As the parent of 2 children I have learned (the hard way) that parenting is much more of an art then an exact science.  However, I think there are some simple rules which make things easier both for the parent and for the child.  One rule that I have tried my best to live up to (probably with some lapses, I should check with Sasha and Louis) is:  Mean what you say and do what you say. What do I mean by that ?  I'm sure we have all come across parents who have difficulty in getting their message across to their children.  Go to bed, Clean up your room, Stop playing with that ball,  Do your homework etc...
At some point in the process a parent will often have to spell out the consequences of being ignored (no pocket money, no screen time, no telephone for a week, no going to a friend's house, etc...).  So once you have made the consequence clear you need to follow through : Do what you say!  I am always amazed at how many times I hear parents telling their children something and then not following through.  How is a child supposed to know when his or her parents mean something if there consequences are haphazard and completely random?  The necessary corollary to this is : Mean what you say!  If when you say something you will actually carry out then you must be sure that what you say is realistic and proportionate.  Never threaten things that your child knows will not happen (We'll go to grandma's house without you, you'll never have friend's over again, the cleaning lady will not clean you room anymore, etc).   

Every time you threaten something you lose a little bit of your authority, and every time you threaten something and don't follow through you lose even more.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Day 365 (bis) : End!

Well this is it.  After 365 days my blog is finally coming to an end.  I know there have been ups and downs, good and bad, controversial an...