When Fianna and I exchanged vows in 2012 our most important vow was that we would never let the sun go down on an argument. So far we have managed to keep that vow for 2,530 Nights (there was 1 minor exception). I actually believe that it should be a mandatory for all weddings to replace all that guff about "honour and obey" or "in sickness and in health" with our vow (copyright to be discussed). When couples have arguments there are three possible outcomes:
- One or both parties stays angry and sullen which usually brings about increased grievance
- One or the other decides to ignore the issue. Somebody just pretends the argument didn't happen, which usually means the other party will feel frustrated
- Both parties continue to discuss the issues and make their points until the both feel they have been heard. The issue may not have been resolved but both people can move on without feeling frustrated or angry.
I assume everybody has guessed which is the preferred solution in order to maintain a healthy marriage? When you write it down it seems obvious but often its feels nearly impossible to get to that 3rd option. I do feel blessed that I have a wife who is as committed as I am to that vow. Thanks you for your understanding Fianna.
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